


helping hand.

by dolphineclaye



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Like Lots, Lots of Angst, One Shot Collection, Self-Harm, i like torturing myself and my readers with it, y/n, yay fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:40:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29173563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dolphineclaye/pseuds/dolphineclaye
Summary: just a collection of marvel oneshots, mostly hurt/comfort ones So You Can Live Vicariously Through Y/N Too!will take requests if there's anything you wanna see! [within reason ;) ]Includes self-harm and references to self harm, so if this could trigger or upset you please skip the chapter, there will be warnings beforehand! :)
Kudos: 7





	1. hummingbird - steve rogers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw - contains descriptions of anxiety and anxiety attacks

Today you were not having a very good day. Your anxiety was acting up, and it was acting up bad. It was like the inside of you was hollow, except for a single hummingbird, that left a fast beating noise in your ears, and a thudding behind your eyes. Every so often the hummingbird would run into your ribs, and you couldn't breathe for a moment, but then it would go back to normal and you could continue on, trying to ignore the hollow-hummingbird combination.

You went on with your day, forcing yourself to keep working, do what your superiors at S.H.I.E.L.D told you to do, but you always found your mind ending back at the pounding of your heart, the nauseous feeling in your stomach 

When it neared lunch, you found yourself concentrating on pushing the breaths in and out of you and not much else. The pounding spread from your chest to just behind your eyes. The ribs you could take, but this constant thudding in your head was painful. 

Eventually, you found it too hard, and you had to get out. You excused yourself, quickly left your desk and tried to find an empty office, closet, anything. Soon enough you found a cleaning supply closet, filled with brooms, and a mirror in the corner. You closed yourself in there, and walked over to the mirror.

The pounding was taking its toll. There were grey bags under your eyes, your skin looked ghostly pale, and a permanent expression of pain was etched into the lines on your face. 

You splashed water on your face, hoping that would work. It didn't. You rubbed your eyes, your cheeks. The buzzing and fluttering and banging stayed. You closed your eyes and held your head in your hands, leaning on the sink. The thudding was still there, you now weren't sure if it could ever get out, but this made it quiet down a bit. So you stayed like that, you weren't sure how long for.

And then you started to cry. No build-up, just gut-wrenching sobs. Maybe the hummingbird inside you would be forced out along with them, you thought. But it didn't seem so. You kept sobbing, crying, your eyes puffy, your cheeks covered in tear tracks, your hair bunched up in your fingers. You were crying so hard that you didn't notice the knock on the closet door. Didn't notice the man open it, worried. Didn't notice him gasp quietly at your sobbing form, now sitting on the cold, tiled floor. He crouched down in front of you, worry furrowing his brows.

He called out again, and this time you noticed. You looked up from your hands, and saw him, looking at you in concern. Your eyes widened once you realized who it was. Steve Rogers. You had met him once or twice around the S.H.I.E.L.D complex, but you didn't expect him to remember you. You drew your hands up to wipe the tears off your face, in vain however, as more kept running down and dripping off your chin. You watched him, waited for him to say something.

"Are you okay?"

You sniffed. "Oh, um yeah, I'm—"

He gave you a look, stopping you. "Dumb question, I can see that you're not okay. You might not want to talk to me, but I'll listen if you do, Y/N."

"You remember me?" you asked, surprised he knew who you were. 

He smiled softly. "Of course, we've met a couple of times. So if you want to tell me whatever's going on, I'm here." 

You stayed silent for a while, still just looking at him. You didn't know what to say, how to say anything. And then, you burst into tears again. No one had asked you if you were okay in a long time. You felt the thudding against your ribs again, pushing out all air, and you inhaled forcefully, dragging air back into your lungs.

"Hey, hey, hey, are you okay?" he asked, the concern on his face more prominent. Steve moved around so that he was sitting next to you on the floor. 

You took in another deep breath, on purpose this time. You didn't really want to tell him about your problems, but soon it felt like the words were falling out of your mouth and you couldn't stop them. "I'm- I just don't know what to do! I feel like my heart is beating to fast all the time, and sometimes I just can't breathe. Everything just seems to overwhelming, and I try to ignore it, but it just seems to be getting worse, and I just don't know how I'm going to live with it!" 

You shut your mouth quickly, shocked at your own words. You waited for Steve to look at you weirdly, to take back his offer and leave you sitting on the floor. But he didn't.

He kept looking at you, brows still furrowed. Then he let out a small sigh. "I understand, in a way. After I came out from under the ice, everything was so different and overwhelming. It was like I was an alien, and I may as well have been. So many things seemed to be going on all the time, and it was hard to cope. But it gets better. My friends helped me. You're going to be okay."

You looked at him, and laughed wetly. "God, I must look so pathetic, sobbing on the floor of a broom closet."

Steve smiled. "No, you just look like a woman who needed a bit of help, and a friend." He stood, then held his hand out, offering to help you up. You took it, and stood beside him.

"Thank you," you said, and then leaned over to hug him. "I think that's exactly what I needed."

He hugged you back. "Would you want to get lunch? I feel like you're a sushi kind of girl, and I wouldn't mind some."

"I would love to," you replied, now smiling. "Sushi's one of my favorite foods."


	2. first day - tony stark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw - contains descriptions of panic attacks/anxiety attacks

You headed down the corridor, a smile on your lips. It was your first day at your new job at Stark Industries. You were so excited to work there, it was something you had dreamed of for a while. The division you worked in was in charge of biochem scientific research.

When you arrived in your 'office' space, you looked around. It was a large room with two other people in it, working at benches. It seemed that the three of you would be sharing a work space together. The two others looked up once you arrived in the room, but the man looked immediately back down, seeming to not care.

"Hi," you said awkwardly, raising a hand in greeting. "I'm Y/N. I'm the new girl, I've been assigned in here?"

The woman working on the left bench smiled at you. "Hey there, I'm Jemma. Welcome to the chaos room," she turned to the man on the other side of the room. "Tim! Be nice and say hi to Y/N, she'll be working in here with us." She turned back to you, and lent over, stage-whispering. "He's the grumpiest biochemist you'll ever meet, don't take it too personally."

"Hey, I can hear you!" The man named Tim turned to the two of you. "You can go over there, that's the emptiest bench," he said, waving a hand in the direction of the back of the room. "Welcome, I guess." He then turned back to his work, scribbling something in a notepad.

You took your things over to the bench Tim had vaguely pointed to, and dumped them on top. You then looked at some of the papers on the desk, and started to work.

It was quite late in the afternoon when Jemma and Tim started to pack up. You saw them doing so, but just went back to your work, determined to finish it before the day was over.

"Y/N," said Jemma. "It's 6:00.p.m, you can go home now. At least, that's when most of us leave."

You smiled at her. "Thanks Jemma, but I'm so close to finishing this, I think I'll just stay late for a little while, I want to get it done."

"All right then." Jemma waved before heading out the door. "Hope you don't stay too long, see you tomorrow!"

Tim just grunted before following Jemma out the door, and you figured it was his way of saying 'goodbye'.

Turning back to your work, you looked determinedly at the beaker in front of you. And so you kept working, until most of the lights in the surrounding offices were out, and soon it was just yours.

You looked at the time, and were shocked to find it was 7:00.p.m. Glancing over all your equipment, you realized that unless you wanted to be here until midnight, you should probably pack up and leave the rest for tomorrow. You started to gather your things when the door to the office burst open. You turned to it, and were stunned to find Tony Stark himself stumbling into your office, looking very distressed.

\--

Tony was having one of his bad days. His anxiety seemed to be skyrocketing, and he had almost gone into a fully blown panic attack this morning over the mention of New York. Usually he wasn't affected by any mention of the 2012 invasion anymore, but every so often, like today, he was tipped over the edge by the smallest things. So he tried, very hard, to have the least stressful day possible. He stayed in his work space and worked on a new suit for majority of the day, and this definitely helped. But then in the late afternoon, around 6:00.p.m, he got a call from Pepper.

"Hey Pep, what's up?" he asked, trying to ignore the bubbling nervousness inside him.

"Hey Tony, one of the department heads asked for a last minute meeting at Stark Industries. It shouldn't take too long, could you just come and sit through it? You can go back home in no time."

"Uh, sure thing. I'll- uhm I'll be there soon," said Tony, grabbing a rag to wipe the oil off of his hands. He hung up, and then ran into his room quickly to grab a suit jacket he could throw over his t-shirt. He then pulled on some sunglasses, and slid into the driver seat of one of his cars, telling himself that he could get through it, it was only a meeting, nothing too bad.

Once he got there, he arrived at the meeting room just in time for it to start. It was filled with all the department heads, plus Pepper, and to be honest Tony wasn't sure why he needed to be there. But he sat there, waiting for the department head who called the meeting to begin.

It seemed like the universe was definitely not on his side. The reason the department head had called the meeting was because of some only very recently found unpaid bills from the clean up of the New York alien attack. Of course that was what was happening. Of course it was happening today, one of Tony's now very rare bad days. Because, why not?

As soon as the words New York and Chitauri left that department heads mouth, Tony felt his mouth become dry, and his heart speed up so fast he wasn't even sure if it was still beating. He swallowed, blinked hard and took a deep breath, trying desperately to quell the nausea that didn't seem to be going away.

Pepper seemed to notice his distress, and put two and two together quickly. Are you alright? she mouthed at Tony, worry creasing her brow.

Tony forced a smile onto his face. Of course, he mouthed back. There was no need for her to worry about him, she had too many other things to be worried about anyway. Pepper didn't seem too convinced, but turned back to the front of the room, where the department head was now presenting photos from the aftermath of the Chitauri attack. Fuck organised people who present slideshows at meetings, thought Tony, fuck them all. But in spite of it all, Tony managed to make it through the entire meeting without passing out or gasping for air. As soon as everyone was leaving, Tony needed to find somewhere to calm down. He practically ran around the corner and down the hall, desperate to find an office that wasn't locked, maybe there was one that still had a light on?

And to his immediate relief, at the end of the hallway was one of the biochem offices, its door unlocked and its fluorescent white lights still blissfully on. Tony raced down the hallway, and without thinking to check if anyone was in there, burst into the room. He did not notice the startled new girl at the other end of the room.

You watched as Tony Stark stumbled into the corner, and slid down onto the floor. Walking slowly towards him, you recognized the signs of a panic attack. Your sister had them unfortunately often, so you knew how to deal with them, and you'd be damned if you were going to leave him on the floor like that.

"Mr Stark?" you asked warily. "Uh Mr Stark, my name's Y/N. I work here at Stark Industries. Here, where we are right now. In the biochem offices at Stark Industries. You're here at Stark Industries with me, Y/N. Can you hear me Mr Stark?"

Tony had his face in his hands. The black hole, the missile, falling down to earth was playing on the backs of his eyelids. He knew there was someone speaking to him, but he couldn't bring himself to hear what she was saying, all he could hear were screams and crashes and explosions.

He wasn't listening, you realized. You moved slightly closer, but not too close, you didn't want to scare him even more, and sat down on the floor also. "Mr Stark? T- Tony Stark. You are here with me, Y/N, on the floor of the biochem offices at Stark Industries, do you hear me? The two of us are sitting on the tiles of the biochemistry level in the Stark Industries building. Please, Mr Stark, nod if you can hear me."

Mr Stark moved his head up and down in his hands. You sighed in relief. He was still here.

"Listen Mr Stark. I want you to repeat after me. 'I am on the floor of the biochem labs at Stark Industries. I am safe.'"

There was a moment of silence and you weren't sure if he knew what you had said. But then, Mr Stark let out a mumbled:

"I- I'm on the floor of the- of the biochem labs at Stark Industries. I am, uh, I am safe." Mr Stark kept his hands determinedly over his face.

Your brows furrowed. "Mr Stark, I want you to take your hands away from your face, alright? I want you to look around at your surrounding, to see yourself here, in the biochem offices. Can you do that?"

Again, you weren't sure if he heard you, or if he just couldn't do it, as he didn't move for a while. But then, shaky hands slid down his face and into his lap, and his eyes slowly blinked open.

"Good," you said, looking at his pupils darting around the room. "Now, I want you to look me in the eye, see that I am here, on the floor with you."

Mr Stark's eyes slowly slid up to yours. You smiled softly at him, and were pleased to see that his hyperventilating had slowed a bit.

"Hi Mr Stark. It's okay, you're safe. "

The two of you stayed staring at each other while Mr Stark's breathing became slower and slower, until he took one unsteady deep breath, and seemed to be alright.

You moved your head to the side. "Are you alright?"

Mr Stark pressed the heels of his palms to his eyes. "Uh yeah I- Sorry about- ah, all that and thank you for um, y'know."

"It's okay," you said. "You have nothing to apologize for. My sister can get things like that sometimes so I get it. It's okay," you repeated.

The two of you stood from the floor, and Mr Stark brushed non-existent lint of off his suit jacket.

"So- uh Y/N is it? What's a biochemist like you doing still in the building at 7:00 o'clock at night, hmm?"

You smiled at him. "It's my first day, and I wanted to complete all my work. Y'know start off right," you shrugged.

Mr Stark grinned at you. 'Well I like your initiative Y/N, but I think it's time we both went home."

Sighing, you nodded. "I agree, Mr Stark."

"Tony. I think after- uh all that," he said, waving his hands towards the floor, "After that I think you should call me Tony."

"Okay, Tony," you replied, smiling at him.


	3. slippery slope - natasha romanoff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW!! - descriptions of self harm, please don't read if it will trigger you or make you uncomfortable

It started after your mom died. That night, you had gotten into a fight with her over something stupid. It was your dad's birthday, so you had all had a few glasses of wine and were a bit drunk. Some small thing got blown up, and soon the two of you were yelling at each other. Your mom got so mad that she said she needed to leave, and slammed the door behind her. It turns out she went for a drive, to clear her head and cool down. 

The truck came out of nowhere. If she was sober, she probably would've been able to swerve out of the way, but she wasn't, so she didn't. It crashed right into the front of her car 

You blamed yourself. It was your fault she left the house and got into her car. It was because of you that she now lies in a grave, next to your grandparents. You refused to talk to anyone for the first month, you just holed yourself up in your apartment, beating yourself up about it. And soon, you had an idea. 

You knew all about self-harm, and how awful it is. So, you first used scissors. They were blunt, wouldn't break the skin unless you pressed hard enough, but they still hurt. That was the rule you made with yourself. Don't draw blood. That way it doesn't count, you don't have a problem. Technically it wasn't self-harm, because you didn't see blood, and self-harm is only when you use razors and bleed. Of course, that's what you thought. 

It seemed as though the universe was telling you to do this, because soon enough it was winter, and you could hide it underneath sweaters and coats. No one noticed, not even your girlfriend, Nat. She was worried about you after your mom died, and knew you would blame yourself, so she tried to get you out of the house often. It seemed like you weren't doing well, and she thought about getting you help. But after a month and a half it seemed that you were doing better, coming out of the house more. Little did she know this wasn't because you were processing your grief, but because of the little white lines that were scattered across your forearms, and occasionally your hip. 

It carried on like this for about three months. But then, you noticed that just scratching yourself wasn't as satisfying, didn't help as much as it used to. 

You had locked yourself in your bathroom, and were scratching away at your wrist when you got the impulse. The impulse to just press a little harder, to see tiny beads of crimson line your arm. It was only a little bit, so it still didn't count. So, you did. You pressed those scissors harder, and pinpricks of blood appeared on your arm. 

It was a slippery slope from there. Soon enough, this wasn't enough either. It was time for razors. But they were only small cuts, so it didn't count. People who self-harmed had huge gashes, and these were petite bleeding lines. It didn't count. 

The temperature was rising, and you didn't know what to do. You couldn't stop, you just knew that if you stopped things would be bad. So, you kept wearing sleeves. Nat started to realize your new fashion choice when it became quite warm and yet you still were wearing jumpers and long sleeves. 

One night the two of you were sitting on her bed, chatting and watching movies on her laptop. Nat noticed the sweat beginning to form on your forehead. 

"Hey Y/N, it's like 90 degrees, why are you wearing long sleeves? You can borrow a t-shirt of mine if you want?" she asked 

You felt your stomach drop. "Oh. Uh. I'm just not that hot. You know I'm always cold, Nat," you chuckled, hoping she'd drop it. But she didn't. 

Her brow furrowed. "I can see that you're sweating, you can't be cold. What's going on?" 

"Nothing, I promise," you said, praying your nervousness didn't come through in your tone. You tried to change the subject. "C'mon, are we gonna keep watching this? I wanna know how it ends!" 

"Y/N. What's going on? You wouldn't hide anything from me unless it was important. Please tell me, you’re worrying me a bit now." 

Without thinking about it, you tugged on your sleeves so that you could hold the ends of them in your hands, and itched one of your reasonably fresh cuts through the fabric. It was something you started to do subconsciously when you were nervous, and normally Nat thought nothing of it. But now, being the highly trained spy that she was, some things seemed to click. Color drained from her face as she looked from one forearm to another. 

"Y/N, can I see your arms?" she asked, trying to be delicate. 

You felt your heart pounding in your ears. Nat couldn't find out. She just couldn't. She would leave you. She would figure out that you weren't a good person and she would leave you. "No, Nat, what're you talking about? Let's just keep watching the movie, I gotta know if they defeat the aliens!" 

Nat moved closer to you on the bed. "Show me your arms Y/N. Please." 

Without your consent, a tear welled up in your eye and started to fall down your face. You swiped it away angrily. "NO! Please just- can we just-" And before you could stop yourself, you were crying, more and more tears joining the first. You tried to brush them away at first, but soon gave up and let them fall. 

Gently, Nat put and arm on your shoulder. You flinched involuntarily. 

"I'm going to roll up your sleeves, okay?" 

You wanted to fight it, you really did, but you just felt so tired, tired of keeping your secret for so long. So, you nodded. Nat slowly moved the fabric of your sleeves up to your elbow, and couldn't help the soft gasp at the pink, red and white lines that marred your skin. Some were scars from a while ago, others scabbed over, and some with dried blood still on them. 

Nat looked up from your arm to your face, her eyes shiny. "Oh, Y/N," she whispered. 

You barked out a sob. You didn't know what to do. Suddenly, you were enveloped in a hug. Nat squeezed her arms around you, and you felt her tears drop onto your shoulder. 

"I'm so sorry Y/N. I should've realized sooner. I am so, so sorry," she mumbled into you. When she pulled away, she looked into your eyes. "Why?" 

"I just- I'm not a good person," you managed, sniffling. 

Nat laughed. "You do realize who you're talking to, right?" she paused, and then realized. "Is this because of your mom, Y/N?" 

You nodded. "It's my fault she died. If I hadn't fought with her, she wouldn't have gotten into her car and driven, and that truck wouldn't have-" You choked on a sob, wiping at your eyes. 

The grief and guilt in your voice broke Nat's heart. "Oh, Y/N. Come here." She held her arms out, and you moved into them, hugging once again. "Y/N," started Nat. "I want to tell you something." 

"Mhmm?" you murmured. 

"When I had first joined S.H.I.E.L.D, there was a man in my division called Thomas. I was very guarded, and didn't want to make friends then, but Thomas was determined to see me smile. So, he told me jokes every time he saw me. I never smiled. He kept telling me jokes, and tried every day to make me smile. One day, he was supposed to hand in some kind of paperwork to me the day before, and he hadn't yet. I found his jokes annoying, and found him annoying, so when he approached me and told me one more joke, I snapped at him and told him he needed to get the paper to me now." Nat paused, swallowed. "What I didn't know is that he was already having a pretty bad day. His niece had died the day before. So, when I snapped, he rushed to get it done immediately, without question. Turned out the printers in our building were all down for maintenance, so he planned to run across the road to the newsagents. But, uh, he never made it. He didn't look for cars when he crossed and- uh and he was run over. Thomas passed away a few days later." 

You looked up at her. "Nat, I'm so sorry." 

She smiled at you. "I blamed myself for his death for years after that. Couldn't forgive myself." 

"But Nat, you didn't-" You stopped, and it hit her. "Oh," you whispered. 

"I know it feels like it's all your fault. I know it seems like you'll never feel better. But I promise, it will. You didn't kill your mum, Y/N, okay?" 

You nodded, not really believing her. Nat sensed this, and placed her hand under your chin. 

"Hey. I'm here for you. I don't plan on going anywhere. We're going to get through this, okay? It might not be easy, but we can do it. Together." 

You looked at her, at Natasha Romanoff, your wonderful girlfriend. Tears filled your eyes once more. "Thank you, Nat.”


	4. nightmare - bucky barnes

It was a Saturday night, and you were at your boyfriend, Bucky Barnes’, apartment. The two of you had spent the night catching Bucky up on some iconic 2000's movies that he hadn't seen, and you had ended up both falling asleep on the couch. He had his arm draped around you, and you were cuddling into him. It was nice, the two of you being comfortable. 

You were quickly woken up when he started thrashing around. You landed on the floor with a dull thud as he pushed you off, and you grunted in surprise. It only took you a few seconds to realize he was having a nightmare. He had had these before, so you did what you've done before.

Slowly and gently, you placed a hand on his shoulder. "Buck," you whispered. "Hey, Bucky, it's okay. Wake up baby, you're okay it's just a dream."

Bucky jerked awake, eyes wide and frightened. He jumped up from the couch, his pupils darting wildly around the room. You walked towards him, ready to hug him like you normally did in these situations, but the second you came closer, you realized you had made a mistake. 

"Отойди от меня! уходи! переехать! "* he yelled, and he ran at you, ramming into your stomach, smashing you against the wall and holding you there.

You yelled out, pain exploding over your back. You were not a fighter, had never been one. "Bucky! Buck please! It's me! Y/N!" you cried desperately. "Come on baby, its Y/N! You're in your apartment, your safe!” 

Bucky blinked rapidly as he seemed to snap out of it, and looked at what he had done, his eyes widening. He let you go, and you fell to the ground, gasping in pain. "Oh my god. Oh my god Y/N. Shit, oh god- are you okay?" He rushed to your side, guilt and worry etched into his face. 

You curled onto your stomach panting. "I... I will be," you said between breaths. 

"Shit Y/N, I am so so sorry. Oh my god, I can't believe I just attacked you, what the fuck was I doing, I am so sorry. Holy shit what have I done." He ran a hand through his hair. "We- we should get you to the hospital or something I- oh my god..." 

Still clutching your stomach, you barked a laugh tightly, then squeezed your eyes shut when it hurt. "How are we supposed to explain this? They'll jump to conclusions, it certainly looks a lot like I have an abusive boyfriend." You paused, forcing yourself to sit up.

Bucky hurried to helped you. You ended up half leaning on him and the wall, arms still tightly across your middle. 

"Fuck, you're right. Uh.. Shit what do we do." He paused, thinking. "...Tony! I'll take you to the tower, he has medical staff there 24/7." Bucky then turned his head to face you. "Shit, I am so sorry Y/N, I really fucked up, I can't believe I hurt you, fuck I-"

"Buck," you cut him off. "It wasn't your fault, okay? You didn't know where you were, it was my fault for getting too close. Don't blame yourself." 

He nodded, but you could tell he didn't believe you. "Okay, I should get you to Tony's. I'll carry you, c'mon."

You agreed, and slowly stood up on shaky legs. The triumph you felt for standing by yourself was dampened by the groan you let out as you felt a stab of pain in your back. "Do you have any Advil? Or something stronger?"

"I've got Advil, I'll go get you some." Bucky quickly went into the kitchen, grabbing the pills and a glass of water, and came back to you leaning against the wall, eyes shut in pain. "Here," he said and your eyes opened. You quickly took the pain relief, and handed Bucky back the empty glass. He put it on the table beside him then held his arms out expectantly. "Come on, let me carry you to the car."  
\----  
*Отойди от меня! уходи! Переехать! = Get away from me! Go away! Move!


	5. nightmare pt 2 - bucky barnes

The two of you were in the car, Bucky driving and you in the passenger seat. You were trying desperately not to make any pained sounds as you knew it would make him feel worse about what he had done.

"Buck," you said, looking over at him.

"Yeah?"

"We should probably call Tony. I mean he's not gonna turn us away, but it is midnight on a Saturday, we don't know if he's going to be able to let us in," you said, the idea just coming to you.

"You're right, fuck," he said, searching for his phone in his pocket, while having his eyes still on the road.

You sighed, smiling. "I'll do it Buck. You're driving, I don't wanna get into an accident as well." It was supposed to be a joke, but you regretted the words as soon as they came out of your mouth.

Bucky bit his lip and his expression looked even more regretful. "Oh, yeah. Right. Sure, you do it."

So, you took out your phone, and wondered what you were going to say. You clicked on Tony's contact, and it started to ring. For a moment you thought he wasn't going to pick up, but then you heard:

"Yeeello? Y/N?"

"Hey Tony, sorry about the late call, uh we have a little bit of a situation."

"What's going on?"

"Uhm, I'm with Buck and I've gotten hurt-- it's not that bad-- we just didn't want to go to the hospital, 'cause with the two of us it looks kinda like he... y'know."

There was silence for a moment. "...Oh, yeah, got it"

"Is it cool if we come to the tower, it's just that you have medical staff there and-"

"Of course, of course. I'll just head down there and make sure they're ready for when you get here. How far are you?"

You looked at the time on your phone "About ten minutes"

"Okay, I'll meet you in the foyer when you arrive.”

"Thank you, Tony, I really appreciate it"

"No worries Y/N, see you soon."

"Bye Tony, thanks again"

You hung up and nodded at Bucky. "He's going to meet us in the foyer when we get there."

\--

Once you got to Tony's, Bucky carried you bridal style into foyer, despite your insistence that you could walk (not really). Tony was standing next to the elevator when you arrived, looking slightly worried.

"Hey Tony," said Bucky warily. He was still tense around the billionaire. Not because he didn't like Tony, but because he was sure that Tony hated him, despite the fact that they had made up a long time ago.

Tony nodded at them and smiled. "The team have prepped a bed for you Y/N. What- what happened?"

Bucky looked down at you nervously. "Uh.. I-"

"I think I have a broken rib," you cut Buck off, purposefully misunderstanding Tony's question. "And bruising, maybe internal bleeding there. Also, similar things on my back." You looked over at Tony, pleading with your eyes that he not ask any more questions.

He seemed to get the message, and nodded again. "Okay, in here and I'll take you to the room.”

The three of you got into the elevator, and came out on the medical wing. Tony led you to a room with a hospital bed, and two medical staff standing beside it. He waved in greeting to them, and repeated what you had told him about your injuries in the foyer. Bucky gently placed you down on the bed, and stood back, feeling awkward in a place like this. You smiled at him, and he smiled back, though you could tell he was beating himself up. You wished you could make understand that you don't blame him, and that it wasn't his fault.

The two medical staff began to look over you. The woman moved your top up, revealing a nasty bruise, shades of blue and yellow mixing together. You watched Tony's eyed furrow in concern at it. The woman then pressed on the bruise slightly, and you hissed in pain.

"Sorry, miss, I just had to check. It does seem like you have a few broken ribs and bruising, but other than that no major injuries," she said. "Would you mind turning over so that we could see your back?”

You nodded and turned. By the sound Bucky made, you guessed your back looked as bad as your stomach. The doctor poked and prodded your back also, and you made noises of discomfort when she did.

"Hmm. Well, it seems that your back is badly bruised, but luckily no major damage as well. It's going to hurt for two weeks or so, so I'm going to give you some pain meds, but other than that you should be fine," she said, and smiled at you before leaving the room to get the medication.

It was silent in the room for a while.

"I gotta use the bathroom, Tony is that..." Bucky asked, trailing off and looking around. 

"Oh yeah," said Tony, gesturing. "It's just around that corner."

Bucky nodded in thanks, and quickly left. As soon as he was out of earshot, Tony came closer to your bed that you were now sitting on. The doctor bustled in and gave you a bottle of pain meds, then left quickly, sensing the tension. 

"Y/N, what happened?"

You sighed. "He had a nightmare, and was really disoriented when he woke up. It was my fault really, I tried to calm him down but I came too close and he freaked out. He- He threw me against the wall. But-" you said quickly, at Tony's expression of horror. "Like I said, it was my fault. I know how he can be; I should've let him get his bearings before going towards him. He was just scared. I'm not sure what he said, but he yelled something in Russian, and he only does that when he's really distressed. Buck feels so awful, I just know it, but it's not his fault. I wish he knew that."

Tony smiled softly. "Yeah, it's- yeah I think I get it. But good idea coming here, okay?"

Nodding, you looked over at Buck as he came back into the room. You smiled at him. "Come on baby, time to go home."

"Alright. Let's go," he said, walking over to your bed to pick you up. "And thank you Tony. Really, I appreciate it." Bucky held out his non-metal hand, and Tony shook it.

"Anytime, Furiosa, always here to help,' said Tony, smirking.

Buck then turned, picked you up from the bed, whilst you still whined about wanting to walk, and carried you out and into the car.

\--

The drive back to the apartment was mostly silent. You didn't know what to say to convince Buck he shouldn't feel guilty, and he just didn't know how to apologize properly. But he tried.

"Y/N, I just- I'm so sorry. It kills me to know I hurt you and I hate that I have the ability to, I'm just so, so fucking sorry—"

"Buck." You turned to face him. "James Buchanan Barnes listen to me. This was not your fault, okay? You have PTSD from all the horrible things that Hydra did to you, and you didn't know what you were doing. I know how sorry you are, but you don't need to feel guilty. You do feel guilty, I know that, and I can't stop that. But I need you to know that I don't blame you, and I don't think this is your fault. Okay?”

He sighed, long and hard. "Okay." Buck stayed silent, looking at the road ahead of him. Then, "Y/N?"

You looked at him. "Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too Buck."


	6. squash a fly - peter parker

You were new to Midtown High School, and had been there for only a couple weeks. It just took a day for you to become friends with Peter, Ned and MJ. They were into all the same kind of things that you liked, and the four of you had a really fun time together. 

You had taken to spending time at Peter's house often. The two of you would watch movies, talk about Star Wars and all different kinds of theories for new computer hardware. One night, you were at his house, and didn't realize what time it was until you checked your phone.

"Shit, I gotta go Peter," you said, scrambling for your things. "It's late, my moms gonna kill me.”

"Oh okay," said Peter, standing from his seat on his bed. "You sure you're okay to walk home, I could ask Aunt May to drop you off?"

You shook your head. "Nah, it's fine. I need the exercise anyway. See you on Monday!" you yelled behind you. 

"Bye Y/N!"

It was semi dark outside, and you realized you were glad you left Peters when you did. You didn't exactly live in the safest part of town, and you had heard of muggings going on at night. Soon enough you figured out that Peters house was a lot further from yours than you had thought. You'd been walking for half an hour at least, and the light had almost all faded. Slightly worried, you took your phone out of your pocket, and held it in your hand, turning the flashlight option on. 

You thought of a short cut home, one alleyway that no one every went into, and then you would be home. So you turned down the alley. As soon as you did, you realized you had made a mistake. A group of three men stood, blocking the way and talking to each other. Once you turned into the alley, they looked over at you. You tried to walk away, hopefully they were just a group of friends....? 

They started towards you as soon as you moved. One of them grabbed your wrist, making you drop your phone on the ground, smashing it. Another held onto your other wrist and they dragged you back into the alley, out of sight. You managed to call out "Help!" once before the third man forced a swab of fabric into your mouth, stopping your ability to talk. He then slapped you across the face.

"No talking, we wouldn't want you to spoil the fun, now would we?" he said, a sick grin on his face.

You kept struggling, not wanting to go down easy. Without warning, you flung your legs out, managing to catch the third man in the stomach. He grunted, and stepped back, his arms around his middle.

"You little bitch!" he yelled, and punched you across the jaw. He then kicked at your legs, a loud cracking noise echoing down the narrow alleyway. You felt blinding pain in your knees and face, but your screams were muffled to grunts by the gag in your mouth.

"That'll teach you," the third man said, and it seemed he was the leader, as he then said, "Hold her down, I'll grab the backpack. Hopefully she's got some cash or a laptop in there."

The other two did as he said, and flattened you on the ground. You waited for them to rip the backpack off of you, but then you heard;

"Get away from the girl!"

Both you and the men searched for the source, and holding on to the side of the alleyway wall was none other than Spiderman. There was something odd about hearing his voice in person, something weirdly familiar.

The third man rolled his eyes. "Buzz of bug boy, don't wanna get involved in things you don't need to."

"Actually," said Spiderman, as he slid down the wall, "As honorary friendly neighborhood Spiderman, I am automatically involved in any form of illegal activity, such as this. Also, not a bug, an arachnid. So I'm gonna ask you again: Get away from the girl."

"Fine. Boys, it's time to squash a fly," said the third man, walking towards the vigilante who was now standing on the ground, leaning against the wall.

"Again. Not a bug or a fly. A spider. Which is an arachnid.

He got no reply as the two other men dropped your arms. You would've run off, but you were in too much pain so all you could do was curl in on yourself. The three men advanced on Spiderman, ready for a fight. But before they could do anything, they were all punched across the face, and webbed onto the opposite wall, unable to move.

Spiderman then rushed over to you, and gathered your huddled form in his arms. He climbed up onto the roof of the building beside the alleyway, and gently placed you down there.

"Hey there miss, I uh, I need to get you to a hospital, do you think you'll be alright if I swing you over there?" he asked, seemingly hesitant.

You couldn't reply, too focused on the agonizing pain in your knees, and the throbbing in your jaw. Spiderman took a step closer to you, and knelt down beside you.

"Y/N?" he asked softly,

You looked up at him then. "Ho- How do you know my name?"

He seemed to realize his mistake as the lenses on his suit widened. "Oh, I saw your uhm... the- the uh... Shit."

And then things clicked, why his voice sounded so familiar. "...Peter?"

He sighed, looked around, and then pulled off his mask. "Uhm, y- yeah.." There was silence as the two of you looked at each other for a moment. "Can I uh, can I swing you to the hospital, you really need medical help."

"Please," you said, smiling slightly, "Getting kicked in the knees by a grown man hurts like a bitch. Oh my god, I can't believe you're Spiderman. Once I'm not in a lot of pain, you're definitely going to have to answer a lot of questions."

Peter laughed and then gathered you in his arms again.

You held an arm out to his chest to get his attention. "Thank you, Peter. I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't come, if I would've-" You stopped.

"I heard your yell from a while away, I'm just sorry I couldn't make it sooner, before this happened," he said, gesturing to you and looking slightly guilty.

"I- thank you."

He just smiled at you in reply, replaced his mask and then the two of you were swinging through the town to Queens Hospital.


End file.
